The Worst Dog in the World

Seriously, he is.  My boy Ace.

The Wild Thing- a few months old here.  That sweet face is deceiving.  

He's two years old and is the worst behaved dog I've ever had.  Well, I take that back.  He is a full-blooded black Lab and is extremely food motivated and extremely intelligent (which can be a bad thing).  He can sit, lay down, and he'll even shake with one of my brother's friends.  He will chase a ball down for hours and is probably the fastest dog in Georgia.  That boy FLIES in my backyard.  He also has the biggest heart of any dog I've ever had.  He loves nothing more than to climb up on the couch or bed and snuggle with me or my mom.  He thinks he's a lap dog and will literally sit on your lap and lay his head on your chest.

That being said, he can be pretty awful.  He is the king of counter surfing.  As I was writing this, I was heating up some frozen chicken wings (let's pretend it was something much healthier).  I heard my mom hollering at me because Ace had jumped up and eaten three chicken wings- bones and all.  

He has torn UP my parents' backyard digging holes.  He loves to find bugs and moles and squirrels and will go crazy searching for those.

It was torture taking him for a walk for a long time because he would take ME for a run practically or else choke himself to death.  My friend Jenna recommended the Gentle Leader, which, if you have a dog that is horrible on a walk, PLEASE spend the $20 and get yourself one of these.  Ace is now the BEST dog on a leash.  But only if he's got his Gentle Leader on.  

He has cost me hundreds and hundreds of dollars (not kidding) because he gets himself into stupid situations.  Like getting a snake bite.  

His back leg on the pillow is the one that was bitten.  He was drugged up on painkillers in this picture.

Like jumping a fence, ripping his stomach open, and needing staples and stitches.

This was after he had his surgery and was stapled up.  He was, again, on painkillers here.  That yellow stick looking thing is a tube that had to be inserted into the wound to drain it.

Like accidentally killing a mole just because he wanted to play with it.

I have crated him since he was a puppy and he normally loves his crate.  Last year, when I was still living in Athens, I came home one day and he was out of his crate.  Freaking Houdini dog got out of his crate.  I'm still not quite sure how, but he busted through the crate.  It's not a plastic one, it's one of those huge metal ones.

I was able to fix it, but he busted out of it again, this time permanently ruining it.  I've never known a dog to bust out of a crate and break it.  Twice.

He's been relatively calm lately.  Except he still tries to attack snakes and he still jumps the fence.  We have a creek in our backyard behind the fence and he'll go swimming/running through that a lot.  Plus, any little animal he sees he'll take after it without a second thought.

These past few jaunts out into our neighborhood have lasted thirty minutes, an hour.  He simply will not come when you call him.

I don't know what to do!  My parents have a 4 foot fence, which is obviously not tall enough for him.  When I move out, I have to get a 6 foot privacy fence so he can't see anything or jump that high.

He LOVES being outdoors, but I would hate for him to get hit by a car or get lost or something worse.  And I could move out this summer, but I really want to be a little bit more financially stable.  Cause fences aren't cheap!!  Until then, I'll have to take him outside on a leash to use the bathroom.

Do any of y'all have any suggestions?  I'm willing to try anything!!